Good Grief: Comfort and Loss
Have you ever considered how much our sense of comfort is dependent on those we love? And when we lose them, how much of that comfort disappears? I've pondered this question a lot, especially in light of my own personal experiences with death. It's clear that losing someone we love is difficult, but it also changes us in profound ways that we may not even realize at first. As I was watching one of my favorite shows, Once Upon a Time, one of the characters, Henry, posed the question: "If the presence of loved ones in our lives brings us the comfort of home, then what are we left with when they're gone?" It's a thought-provoking question that speaks to the importance of our relationships with those closest to us.
In addition, the losses we experience in life go beyond just losing loved ones. We also lose chances, belongings, recollections, skills, opportunities, and at times, everything we hold dear. These losses provide us with a sense of contentment, and it's imperative that we mourn them as well.
It is a universal truth that grieving is a difficult experience, yet it also brings about transformation and plays a significant role in shaping our sense of personal comfort. The Grief Recovery Institute, an organization that specializes in supporting people through the grieving process using research-based methods, defines grief as the conflicting feelings caused by the end of or change in a familiar pattern of behavior.I find this definition particularly insightful as it highlights the friction that is caused by the disruption of our behavior, which can result in either drawing us closer to comfort or pushing us further away from it.
Now, I’m interested in hearing how you have dealt with the experience of losing someone or something and how it has affected you. Share your thoughts in the comments below or on instagram and tag me @nooked.us.
Enjoy this week’s Comfort in Conversation, Maker’s Playlist, and Cultivating Comfort activities. :)
Stay Nooked!
xoxo,
EboniJoi
Comfort In Conversation-Episode Two: Matthew Brown II
Join me every week for Comfort in Conversation, a weekly interview series highlighting personal experiences. Every week, a guest is invited to answer a series of thoughtful questions and share their unique insights on how comfort has shaped their life.
This week’s guest is Matthew Brown II. I first met Matt while trying to move a couch - more on that later! Take a moment to hear what Matt has to say about finding comfort through faith, fitness, and funny. And no, Dateline did not sponsor this episode! :)
p.s Excuse the background noise and my intense cackle HAHA. Audio quality will improve over time :) Thanks for the patience, folks!
The Maker’s Playlist: Good Grief
The Comfort Blog's playlist for this week is focused on the journey through grief. Losing someone or something is an inevitable part of life, and grieving is a challenging experience. However, it can also lead to transformation and plays a crucial role in shaping our personal comfort..
NILE - Beyonce, Kendrick Lamar
Funeral - James Blake
Bury Me Next to You - Bilal
A.P.I.D.T.A - J A Y E L E C T R O N I C A
Robyn - Cktrl
River - Ibeyi
Cultivating Comfort: A Book & Journal Club!
July Book: The Four Agreements by Don Miguel Ruiz
The Four Agreements by Don Miguel Ruiz is a powerful book that offers a new perspective on life and relationships. The agreements outlined in the book are simple but profound: be impeccable with your word, don't take anything personally, don't make assumptions, and always do your best. By following these agreements, Ruiz argues that we can create a life of happiness, love, and fulfillment. The book is a must-read for anyone looking to improve their relationships and live a more meaningful life.
I've already read this book, and I'm looking forward to reading it again with a focus on how it can enhance our sense of comfort and belonging. While reading, let's take some time to ponder these questions.
1. Which of the four agreements do you find most challenging to follow in your own life and why?
2. How have the four agreements outlined in the book helped you to improve your relationships with comfort?
3. In what ways has reading The Four Agreements changed your perspective on comfort and personal growth?
4. Have you noticed any positive changes in your overall well-being since incorporating the four agreements into your daily life?
I’ll publish my response to these questions at the end of the month!
Journal Prompt: Let’s do some Good Grieving
Write about a chance, belonging, skill, opportunity, or person that you have loss. How did it make you feel when it happened? How does it make you feel now to reflect on it? Do you think this loss contributed to your progression or regression in life?
Please take your time during this journaling session. Allow any emotions that arise while writing to come and go. It’s all a part of the process.
Activity - Creating Comfort Goals
I hope you were able to rest well last week. This week, take some time to make a short list of comforting habits that you can easily incorporate into your daily routine. These new habits should not require a lot of effort or disrupt your current routine. They should instead complement your existing routine and make it more enjoyable or easier. After creating a list of 2 to 5 habits, start incorporating them into your daily routine. Remember to be patient with yourself as habits can be challenging to establish, but don't give up. With time and persistence, you will be able to maintain a consistent routine. As an example, here's my own list. Good luck!
Morning Vinyasa Flow Yoga
Breakfast smoothie
Daily Walks (outside or treadmill)
After reflecting on your list, did you find it challenging to come up with your goals? Are you feeling hesitant about incorporating new habits into your routine?
Share your experience/reflection/thoughts with me! Leave a comment here or tag @nooked.us in a post on instragram or threads!
Come and lend a hand with Nooked as we distribute bottled water at the Philadelphia Municipal Services Building this Sunday, July 16th, at 12 PM. See additional details here.